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Tag: Pastor

A Hope Deferred…

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.
-Proverbs 13:12, ESV

Just the other day, I did something that I was not expecting to do: I declined an invitation to preach in view of a call to be the senior pastor at a small church in another state. Why was I not expecting to do this? Because I feel a strong sense of calling to the pastorate and this is the first church that has considered me for a pastoral position. And I really wanted to make it work. Now, why didn’t I go? No peace. None at all. I was having no peace about it and I was full of anxiety and stress. Now, don’t get me wrong, there is a level of anxiousness that goes with most anything new, whether it be a job, a child, or anything. However, the anxiety I was feeling was almost to the point of an attack. And thus, it because overly stressful. There are many other reasons that go with the totality of circumstances as to why I did not go to this church that I am not going to discuss here, needless to say when all was said and done, there was no real peace about it.

Now, to the Scripture that is above, Proverbs 13:12, “Hope deferred makes the hearth sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” My hope, my desire is to pastor a local church somewhere, at some point, whether it be as an associate pastor or senior pastor, I don’t know. But, that is my desire, my “hope deferred” if you will. If you look at the Hebrew of the words for “hope” and “deferred,” you see two starkly contrasting words. The word “hope” is “tohelet” (I hope I don’t offend some language scholar out there, I’m still figuring out how to do all the accents and other markings). And it means an expectation, a hope, and in this sense, of future events. It is my hope and expectation that, in the future, I will be, Lord willing, shepherding a flock of Jesus’ people. The word for “deferred” is “msk” which means to seize, to carry off. And in this case, I carried myself off.

However, my ultimate desire, one that is more important than that to become a pastor, my ultimate desire is to be obedient to God’s Will and His Spirit’s leading on my life. So, my “desire fulfilled” is that I strongly believe that I am being 100% obedient to God’s will in my life and for that of my family in the decision that I made. The Hebrew for “a desire” is “taawa” (once again, Hebrew scholars, don’t hate me. Leave a comment and help me learn!). This word means a longing, wish, yearning; a craving even. I, as a follower of Christ, need to be craving God’s will for my life.

So, as I am here, sitting in my nearly empty bedroom as we are getting ready to move, having turned down what I think would have been a sure bet at a bi-vocational pastorate position in a small Southern Baptist Church. And now, I am still relying on God, following His will for my life, where ever that may lead. Is it easy? No. Is it rewarding? Yes. God is providing and His provision is more than we need, even when we don’t think it is.

 

“And then comes Monday.”

“Then comes Monday.”

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A while back, I read Jared C. Wilson’s The Pastor’s Justification,” which was an excellent read, and I think that it would be edifying to more than just a pastor or lay leader, but to involved members and attendees of the local church.

The following excerpt from The Pastor’s Justification has been stuck on my mind for months now, and this is so true for any type of ministry, from preaching to teaching Sunday School, from law enforcement to child welfare work, and everything in between. It’s not always going to be Mondays that come, it might be any day of the week. However, we must be ready for that time of shepherding or ministry when it comes, when we are exhausted, when we might not really want any part of it.

“Then comes Monday. Many pastors take Mondays off because of the Sunday hangover. I do not. It is my worst day, so I refuse to give it to my family. Instead I work through it. It is a slog. Monday morning is when the e-mail inbox and telephone mailbox are thickest. Monday morning is when people still have questions or concerns or criticisms about Sunday. (They are starting their week full, remember? They came to church for the pick-me-up, and most of them got it.) Like everybody else, pastors are taking stock of what all must be accomplished in the week ahead. But Sunday was not a day of filling up for pastors, but pouring out.
On Monday mornings I enter my office at about 8: 00 a.m. and find that, like Sisyphus, the stone I spent the previous week pushing up the hill lay at the bottom again, ready for another go. Monday morning I must pastor. But what kind of must?
I am faced with this challenge: will I shepherd under compulsion, or willingly, as God would have me?
My first instinct is to make my shepherding contingent on my energy level. But really, my ability to exercise oversight willingly flows from my vision. No, not a vision for an “awesomely bold” church— at least, not at first— but of my God and for the flock of God that is among me.
How we see God on Monday morning will affect whether we oversee his church willingly or under compulsion. And how we view the people in our church will affect whether we oversee them willingly or under compulsion.
Our omnipresent Savior is waiting for me in the office on Monday morning. “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest,” he says (Matt. 11: 28). I am plum tuckered on Monday morning. I face ample temptation to wallow. But Jesus promises rest. I may be a shell of a pastor at this time each week, but God is no less God. His might is no less mighty. His gospel is no less power. His reach is no less infinite. His grace is no less everlasting. His lovingkindness is no less enduring.”
(Wilson, Jared C. (2013-07-31). The Pastor’s Justification: Applying the Work of Christ in Your Life and Ministry (pp. 33-34). Crossway. Kindle Edition.)

This has been greatly convicting to me, in my spirit, because I have been there, not pastorally, but in other areas of life and ministry. I have faced this very temptation to take that next day off. And, I must admit, that I have succumbed to that temptation from time to time. My prayer for myself and everyone is that we face our “Mondays” with the strength that God will provide for us and not hide from them in our own weakness.

 

 

 

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